Thursday, February 28, 2013


1. I haven't been doing so well staying away from the scale. I will endeavor to do better.

2. My eating has been on track most of the week and I have been hitting CrossFit.

3. I love, love, love my Sister's for both having the bridesmaids wear boots to their weddings. This is the pair for the wedding on March 23. After much searching, here they are:

4. I can't believe today is the last day of February. It is going to be summer vacation before I know it:)

5.  I think I am most excited to get another spray tan for this wedding business. I seriously loved the last one... if I were rich, I would get one every 7 days!

Lets recap on goals for 2013 and see how I am doing...

     A- No new clothes until I am at my goal weight- I blew this one. I needed some retail therapy. 
     B- Run 6 races, doesn't matter the length or the difficulty. Just get out there and race. Still nothing in this department, but it is still below zero... it will come. 
    C- Weigh 145 by my 2 year bandiversary. Still haven't lost a stinking pound.. ugh. 
    D- Make exercise something I just do. Still loving CrossFit... I might be addicted. 
    E- Get married. I think we are making progress, baby steps:)
    F-  Pay off Car loan. I'm working on it, snails pace.
    G- Get a treadmill at my house. I have kind of lost faith that this one is ever going to happen. I will continue to pester until someone comes to my rescue. 

6. I love my job. Some days it is hard and not very rewarding, but I seriously work with the best kiddos.

7. I can't wait for some Summer fun. Already have a couple trips planned!

8. Summer also means long days on my horse with my favorite people! It is a good life people.

9. I have to get my DL renewed... I better keep on keepin' on with the weight situation.

10. Though I haven't lost an actual "pound" I am finding new muscle definition everywhere... I am going to go get my 1 month body compistion scan tomorrow and then I will give you the deets on how it compares to a month ago when I had just started CrossFit!

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

What's in your desk drawer

Remember a while ago when Vanessa asked us here what was in our desk drawer?

Well I want to know... and I am ready to share. Here is mine from school today.

Dried Mango's, Nutri Grain bars, Peanut butter, Gatorade, spray paint, plastic fork and spoon (that I use over and over again), Clif bars (white chocolate maca. nut), stickers, lotion, staples, hightlighter, dayquil, rollie-outie colored pencils, there is an essential oil in there as well.

So come on ladies- what is in your desk drawer?

Sunday, February 24, 2013

What if...

What if I just spent 60 trying on everything in my closet making sure that it still fits... and It does. Every peice of it.

What if I am really gaining muscle, and I am letting the scale get me  down?

What if I didn't weigh every day?

What if I only weighed one day a week... like you know, on "the day."

What if I only ate the stuff that I ate when I was first starting out?

I think, these what if's might just lead to a better out look on this weight business.

It isn't just about being skinny, it is about being healthy, being fit.

I'm gonna try it out.

Hell, it can't hurt.

I wonder if I can stand the flat chested hooker up? Stay away from her for a full 7 days. I am sure gonna try. I will weigh in Monday morning, then weigh again the following Monday.

:) Crossfit tomorrow, teaching school and working at the motel.

What will you do?

How many of you follow Lap Band Gal on Facebook? If you don't, you should.

Today she asked a question "What will I do TODAY to make sure that I don't weigh 258lbs again?" 

It got me thinking.

Mostly because the scale said 180.7 this morning. 

I have tears in my eyes as I write this.

I never ever thought I would have to see the 180's again.

The truth is... I didn't have to. 

Keeping it real though, I have been working out SO STINKING HARD! So hard. 

I guess I'm just not eating the right stuff. 

What will I do today to make sure I never weigh 277 pounds again? 

1. I will add more cardio into my weekly workout routine. 

2. I will go back for a my monthly body compisition scan to see if the weight I have gained is lean muscle or if it is fat.

3. I will do better at planning my meals. 

I guess I really think I am doing pretty good with my diet and killing it when I'm working out... so I just don't think the scale is being fair...Such is life.

What are you going to do to make sure you are sucessful? 

Thursday, February 21, 2013


1. I'm killing it at Crossfit. Making it 4 days a week on average. It hurts terribly.

2. I saw a friend of mine today that had "the sleeve" done Decemeber 31st of 2012 and she looks smokin'! I just can't tell you how awesome she is doing already! The lady is an inspiration.

3. I am seriously contemplating Paleo- or something like it. The success stories of pairing that with Crosffit are amazing. It is all about eating clean and staying away from sugar. All things I need help with.

4. I still base too much on the number on the scale.

5. I learned "power snatches" at Crossfit tonight. Sounds dirty, doesn't it?

6. My roommate and a few of her friends got on a train and rode it to Chicago. How freaking awesome is that? It is like 30 hours from here or something ridic. Only cost 200 bucks round trip. The motto at our house is "you are only single once." It works for us.

7. Bailed on a date I had set up for tonight, because he isn't what I am looking for and I just couldn't gut one more "filler date." Even if he does kiss well:)

8. Gracie Lou Freebush makes me happy in my heart. Seriously, if you don't have a dog, and you are in a spot to take care of one, I would highly recomend it. The love they give is amazing.

9. If I don't drink a Gatorade right after doing a Crossfit workout, then I get and EXTREME headache, like "put me in bed, don't turn the lights on and be quiet" kind of headache. Anyone know why?

10. I am ending with a "reminder picture" of where I never want to be again "weight wise."
I was so happy this day. I started riding this horse "Cache" when she was 3 years old. I kept her, loved her, showed her, moved cows on her, until she was 10. At that time she got a new "forever home" with that beautiful girl. I didn't think anyone could love Cache the way that I did, but I was proven wrong. That girl loves her more, I think. This was taken on one of my visits! I probably weighed 255 and I remember being so freaking HOT, but I really was happy!

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Another day

I am glad tomorrow is another day.... We won't talk about the damage I did today.

We can touch on the fact that I spent yesterday with my favorite Cowboy....

and that is all I'm gonna say on that matter ;)

Back to Crossfit tomorrow.

Hitting the reset button.

Ahhhh, seems like I have to every monday. Balls.

Hugs ladies.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

My date, with the Flat Chested Hooker

Wednesday is "the day" that I officially weigh in.

Really I weigh everyday. Only missing once in a while.

Then I record the weight at the top of the page for the day.

On that page I write the water I consume and the calories/protien I intake for the day.

It is always interesting to look back to the begining of the book and remember where I've been.


Todays weight: 176.4
Last weeks: 176.6

Loss of .2

Which is nothing short of a miracle because on Monday I weighed 178.8.

I was terrified. I imediatley scheduled a fill (that I had need for a month or two, but had been avoiding because.... I don't know.)

I've cut out all drinks except water and my post workout Gatorade (more on this later.)

And my 'treats' are under control (i.e. I can have 1 cookie and stop, or 1 serving of brownie.) This is how I have spend most of my journey "eating within reason" but sometimes I get in a bad spot and eat way too many cookies!

Anyway... downwards and onwards. Or something like that.

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

277 or 177 which hurts more?

The question "does your body hurt?" Has been on my mind a lot lately.

It took me back to my very first post titled War (I was a warrior even then and just didn't know it), which I posted Tuesday, February 22, 2011. Before I was even considering the Lap Band. My goals back then were simple, and simply put I have accomplished EACH AND EVERY ONE OF THEM!

Reason number 5 brought me to my blog post today.

5. I am 23 years old and I hurt when I get up in the morning. 

 I remember my skin feeling tight, especially in my face.

I always felt icky.
I always felt tired.
I always felt thirsty.
I always hurt.
I always ached.

All the darn time.
Don't even get me started on the headaches. I always had a headache... Now I know I was dehydrated. My body was screaming for water. 

Which brings me to now.

Now I know what pain is.

I know what it means for every flex of the muscle to groan and protest getting out of bed.
I know how it feels to not be sure my legs will hold me to walk up the stairs.
I know how it feels to be exahusted... I didn't even know what tired was then.
I know how it feels to push my body farther than I ever dreamed possible.
I know how it feels to work a muscle until in knots up and won't relax for hours.
I know how it feels to workout until I am SURE I am going to throw up.

Now ONE HUNDRED POUNDS LIGHTER I know what it means for my body to hurt.

The difference is, it hurts now because it is becoming stronger. It hurt on that Tuesday in Februrary because I was slowly killing it with fast food and Pepsi.

Now I know what pain means, but I also know what it feels like to live.

Never forget where you started and what you've accomplished.

“Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work.” ~H. L. Hunt

Monday, February 11, 2013


I weighed in at 178.6 this morning.


I know some of it is from all the weight training.

Also, some is because I am hungry ALL. THE. DANG. TIME.

So I scheduled a fill.

The darling Amy added .4

Already I feel better.

More "in control."

Today was a good food day. I will NOT see the 180's and I will be back to the 160's ASAP!

Keep on keepin' on.

Thursday, February 7, 2013


1.  I have worked late every day this week, but guess what? I haven't let it be an excuse for why I'm not working out. Three CrossFit workouts DONE!

2. Tonights workout (without the warm up) was
      30 Pull ups
      30 Dead lifts
      30 box jumps
                      3 rounds for time. 

I cut that baby in half. 

      15 pull ups (one giant purple rubber band to assist)
      15 20" box jumps 
      15 55 pound dead lifts.

3 rounds finished in 14 minutes.  It was hard. I felt accomplished.

3. Which brings me to the saying "you can't out train a bad diet." I have been working out like crazy and eating more. While eating more is probably going to happen with the increased workouts, shoveling crap in my mouth is not the solution.

4. Went to the grocery last night. Bought 3 bags of food. Made it home with 2. I was too tired to go and  track down where the other went. It had my cucumbers in it. Sad day.

5. Where is the Warrior today? I hope she is safe and warm.

6. Going wedding dress shopping this weekend for The Sister! I am so excited for her. All the bridesmaids are going. I always love to get a new dress too! :)

7. Ever watched Downton Abby? It is pretty awesome. Check it out.

8. As I typed number 3- I started eating a grilled cheese. Just keeping it real. I need rehab.

9. Long week. Looooooong week. I hope there is a storm brewing to excuse all of the crazy-ness that is going on

10. I almost tossed my cookies at CrossFit tonight. Reminds me of running:)

Wednesday, February 6, 2013


Weigh in Wednesday- WIW

Start weight: 277
Last weeks weight: 173.6
Todays weight: 176.6

2 things-
1. I eat like a horse on the weekends.
2. I have been working out at CrossFit. This includes a lot of weights and I don't really expect the weight to melt off because I am buidling lean muscle mass.

I shall endeavor to base my progress on inches and how my pants/shirt fit.... though I will always be a scale whore I am afraid:)

Just keep Swimming... the 160's are only a few pounds away!

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Dragon Warrior = Crossfit

Wanna hear about CrossFit?
Specifically my box (gym) Crossfit Avenue, and why I really think CrossFit is going to work for me?

1. You have to register for the class before you go. If you don't show, they write your name on the white board and a DNS (did not show.) Shame. CrossFit is all about shaming you into things.

2. You can scale anything. I mean anything. If you want to quit (like I did tonight), it is almost unacceptable. The coach will cut the reps, add a band... whatever. Just DO.NOT.QUIT.

3. The coach/trainer.
Meet Billi and Colter.
They are like my new favorite people.
They could both look at me and think "I don't have time for this crap."

They don't.

Colter would not let me quit tonight. (One day I will get a picture of them, they are both rad!)

4. My box doesn't allow class sizes to get over 8. That is right, you get a trainer and there are no more than 8 of you in your one hour block.

5. Everyone is cheering for everyone. It is the best.

Tonight if I hadn't had accountability partners, had been signed up and showed up to people there expecting me, I wouldn't of went and I sure as hell wouldn't of completed the 6 rounds of the WOD named 'Sean.'

Where do you find your motivatipon to workout?

Monday, February 4, 2013

Going to the chapel...

She is going to get married!

My sister got engaged last Saturday. As in, 2/2/13... and she is getting married 3/23/13 (oh yes, my Mom is in a panic, but it is all good.) 

She even went to try on wedding dresses today. I couldn't be there but my Mom sent me a picture of each dress. Kinda the same thing but not really.

Anyway, that means another bridesmaid dress, spray tan, manicure... the whole shebang. Remember this post when I told you just a few short months ago that my brother Squishy was getting married? I weighed 174 then. That is hella close to what I weigh now. 

I have spent the last 48 hours eating. 

Not because I am not excited as HECK for my sister, because I am. Her groom to be is perfect for her. 

It is because I am selfish.

You see I've always wanted to get married and have a few babies, alright 4, maybe 5. 
Here in Utah land, I'm practically on the shelf. I'm flirting with 26 (I do not, I repeat DO NOT want to hear about how young I am, and how much time I have left. Damn it! This isn't a practicle rant.)

I have spent pretty much the last 10 years dating.

 I'm practically a professional. 

 Professional dating sucks donkey balls. Seriously. 

Also, remember how I live in small town, Utah? Meaning that my parents, grandparents, great grandparents, and one billion  hundred cousins all live/lived here? Well that means everyone knows that I am the "last one left." So please, I am begging you from the bottom of my heart, do not use the line "you are next" when you are talking to me about this wedding. I will do one of two things: 

1. Cry. Silent, streaming tears, that will break your heart...

Or more likley


Or I guess I could shout it while crying, now that would make me and you both feel like crap. 

I will pull it together. I will have fun helping to plan this wedding and all the shinangins that go with it. 

I refuse to give in to the thought "there must be something wrong with me."