Sunday, May 19, 2013

Loosing weight changes everything


I used to believe that loosing weight didn't change anything.

That even after loosing 100+ pounds I would be the same person.

Just wear a differnt size of clothing.

I don't believe that anymore.

It changed things I couldn't even imagine. It didn't change the things that I hoped so badly it would.

I'm the girl in the pink. I just realized that I wear that sweater too much.

That girl in the pink never turned down invitations to go out with friends or go on an adventure because  she had to get her workout in.

Now it happens all of the time.

That girl in the pink drank Pepsi like it was going out of style. Wasn't sure I could make it through the day without it. 

Now? Now I know a person can make it just drinking water. I drink lots of water.
I know that if the weather changes abruptly then I will have to fall back and drink protien shakes for a day or two. 

I haven't touch Pespsi since I wrote this, I am pretty proud of myself. To this day, if I smell it my mouth waters. I will never touch it again.

I run. I do squats and burpees and lift heavy things. That girl in the pink, she didn't know burpees existed.

Know what it didn't change? What I really thought it would? 

How much I date. For real. I always assumed that I dindn't date much because I didn't take care of myself physically.

While I am sure that does play a factor, it wasn't the main reason. 

Nope.  

I can't even begin to express the pain that realization caused me. 

It was rock bottom. 

Because, you know, if I couldn't blame my fat for it, then it had to be me.

It had to be something else I was doing. 

Ugh. Not fun to analyze. 

There was much soul searching to find peace with that realization. 

So when it comes down to it.

Pretty much everything has changed, even if it is just the way I look at it.

What has changed or hasn't changed for you?

9 comments:

  1. Lorie- I love you. You are only 26; your life is still just starting. You will find a great guy and he will be the luckiest man in the world. Your path has just not lead you there yet.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ahh! Robyn! I love you too! I've actually thought a couple of times "I should text Robyn and see how her day is going." Maybe we should exchange numbers?

      I'm not too worried about the dating aread at this point. It was just a difficult pill to swallow when I could no longer blame my weight for certain things. :)

      Delete
  2. honey- you are a beautiful, smart and funny woman- any man would be lucky to have you. You just need to believe in yourself and love and be happy with who you are, because if you can't see all this for yourself and be confident in that how can you expect a man to see it. (seriously, not all men are good at seeing a woman for what she truely is)
    Be patient- love usually finds us when we aren't looking. so keep enjoying life to the fullest and he will find you.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Love this post! I have not had a drop of soda (diet regular, etc.) since Sept. 20th, 2010. Coming up on 3 years this fall. ~~Wish I could say the same about sugar~~ lol!

    ReplyDelete
  4. You are so amazing~ and so young - Robyn is right - the best is yet to come! It truly is a hard pill to swallow when you realize you no longer have fat to blame for your problems. That happened for me last year I think...- but once you make peace with it - life blows you away - in a good way!
    You are a rock star and an inspiration!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Great post my friend! :) For me, everything changed for me. Dating is a completely different experience as a "skinny girl in disguise" for me. Did I tell you that all my dating has led me to now having an actual boyfriend?! LOL :) Keep on going. It only gets better. HugS!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hang in there! That lucky guy will come when you least expect it, and never when you are looking for him! You are so young and have so much to give! I know it can be frustrating when things don't happen when you expect them to. HUGS!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am amazed at all the changes and progress you have made... the rest will come in their own time.

    ReplyDelete
  8. That's a lot of changes. I can't wait until I get to that point. As a young woman who has never dated, I can kind of feel where you're coming from. For me, I know that deep down I'm not ready to share myself with another person in that way, even if it is to just casually date, and being fat or thin won't change when I'm emotionally ready for that. Maybe your in a similar position? It's hard to realize that, but coming to peace with it has made me so much more content with my life. Congrats on all the great changes and accomplishments so far and may you find all the happiness you're looking for. :D

    ReplyDelete