Kow-a-bunga

"Would you like me to give you a formula for success? It's quite simple, really. Double your rate of failure. You are thinking of failure as the enemy of success. But it isn't at all. You can be discouraged by failure or you can learn from it, So go ahead and make mistakes. Make all you can. Because remember that's where you will find success." 

- Thomas J. Watson 




I'm going to tell you ladies that this is the real deal. People tell me that I inspire them, well I haven't felt very inspiring lately, in fact, I feel just the opposite. (Miki, I love you! We have always been so much a like. Wanna run a 5k together? You pick one and I'll drive out and do it with you? Or we could just plan a day and run our own 5k? What do you think? I'm serious.) Ladies, check her blog out! She isn't a banded diva but she is bad-A none-the-less!

I'm going to run a 1/2 marathon, I'm going to finish before the van of shame has to come pick me up.
I'm going to get to goal weight.
I'm going to continue to live a healthier, more active lifestyle.
I'm going to be a fierce Dragon Warrior- for life.

What have I learned about myself? That I can't exclude entire food groups. Saying "absolutely no candy/treats" has triggered more binging than any other thing I've ever attempted (not been pretty ladies). So I'm going to continue with my previous plan with a few adaptations. (Thanks to Cat)

1 point for each mile ran.
1 point for each day I stay under 1200 calories.
1 point for each day that I meet expectations for a workout.
3 points for each pound lost.

-1 point for each 1-99 calories I go over my 1200 calorie allotment.
-1 point for each skipped exercise.

Each point is worth 1 dollar, I can chose when to redeem the points, but not before my 1 year bandiversary. (This post is going to rock... well I hope. At least the pictures will be memorable.)

What do you think ladies? Can I do it?

Shameful 10 Things Thursday (Butter(freaking)finger)

1.       What in the hell is wrong with me? Honestly?! The week has been great, doing well food choices, and exercise rocking! Then, yesterday? Morning- awesome. Even though I was traveling. Then, on the way home, I tossed my sugar/junk food fast out the window- I don’t know how it happened. I ate orange sherbet, because everyone else was. Then I ate a Butter(freaking)finger,  I don’t even know how it got there. Then? I ate another one… I was seriously in a zone where I knew what I was doing but just didn’t give a shit. Then? Oh, yeah, then I ate a ½ bag of Kettl* Cooked Salt and Vinegar chips (don’t trick yourself into thinking it was a grab size bag). Then? Then I skipped running. Yeah, so much for making better habits. I’m disgusted with myself. DISGUSTED. And I was so, so, so sick. Then I didn’t sleep well at all? I wonder why- duh!

2.       I’ve got to make some serious mental adjustments if I am going to rock this weight loss long term.

3.       Warrior status? Monday- 1000 calories, 2 mile run (Which hurt because I hadn’t been in 2 weeks, but felt good anyway.)  Tuesday- 1200 calories, 3 mile run! Felt good, really hot.

4.       I’m seriously wondering if I can run a ½ marathon. I just feel like everything is spiraling out of control, and it is my own fault.

5.       I think this is the post-binge depression talking.

6.       I bought size 8 shorts yesterday. Wonder how long they would fit if I continued down the buttered path?

7.       Did I mention that both of the Butter(Freaking) fingers were KING SIZED! (Or share size I think they call them these days, but I’m not sharing.)

8.       I had to make two stops at 7-11 for the Butter(freaking)fingers.

9.       The lady at 7-11 (I live in a small town, and so people just know people) said; “So and so told me you have lost a lot of weight.” I said “yeah, I have” she then looks at my SECOND KING SIZE Butter(freaking)finger in a 20 minute span and said “how?” I could tell she was thinking “No freaking way, you lazy, yucky, Butter(Freaking)finger eating bum. I wasn’t ashamed enough not to mindlessly eat that sucker in the car. Shame came later.

10.   The difference between 11 months ago and today? 11 months ago I would have continued to eat today (liek I did yesterday), not felt guilty, and just kept on keeping on. Today? Back off sugar. 4 mile run planned. I might have took a STUPID pit stop at Butter(freaking)finger land, but I didn’t park there. I’m already leaving and on my way to a better place.

a.       I wanna be in the 160’s next weigh-in and I know I can do it.

weekly weigh

Start weight: 277

Last week: 173 (liquids because band was being crazy)

This week: 172.2 I'm happy with any loss since I'm eating again.

Total loss: 104.8

Get your workout on! I'm traveling but I'll fit in something today... hopefully a walk around a mall :)

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My Dragon Warrior plan for June 1st...

So, remember when I went on a sugar fast? Then a few days after that my band tightened up like a bi-polar cow and refused to let me eat anything solid for a week? I couldn't eat "normally" until I went and got some fluid out of my band. The problem is, when I was off of solids, I broke the sugar fast and had some ice cream. (Judge if you want. Haters gonna hate.) Anyway, I proceeded to eat my way through the weekend, smart I know.
Well, I'm back on the wagon today, ready to kill the next 28 pounds. My plan of attack (which I will be reporting on daily, because I think I need some major accountability) is the following.

Sugar/junk food fast until June 1st- which is 40 days and just happens to be my 1 year bandaversiry, and the day before my 25 birthday.
Order some UNJURY protein powder.
100 ounces of water a day.
Protein first
pack a lunch, don't skip this meal.
EXERCISE! (I've been a slacker, even had a dream that I tried on my exercise pants and they exploded in 109 thousand pieces because I was so huge, paranoid much?)
AND....
I'm going to pay myself to get where I want to be by the "1 year date."  June 1st!

Here's the deal:
40 Day junk food fast- $40
35 days of exercise- $35
Weigh 162- 50$
1$ dollar for every pound lost total- hopefully$115
4$ for every pointed dropped on the BMI scale- hopefully $80
1-6 mile "I didn't stop one time" run- $40
1 dollar for every mile ran- hopefully a lot.

I've got a plan ladies, now I'm going to CRUSH IT!

Happy Monday

BYOC

This is my first BYOC... Thanks Draz! 
1. Do you have any siblings? What is your relationship with them? Good, bad, ugly?

I have 3 siblings and 1 sister-in-law. I pretty much love them all. 
Oldest brother and his wife live through the hay field from my parents (Yeah, we are those people.) SIL is a huge support for me. AMAZING (and she has cute kids.) 
Squishy, the youngest brother, is a hound hunting, gun toting, Mountain Man. I love him, and think he is hilarious. 
Tater, the sister, is one of my best friends. She is a animal whisperer... seriously, she just connects with animals and is amazing. 
My relationships with them are all good, and kinda different, we spend TONS of time together. 

I don't have a picture of my Older brother and his family on my computer:) 

2. Let’s talk pizza. Do you prefer homemade or restaurant? What toppings are your fave?

Restaurant, thin crispy crust, Hawaiian. Yummy. 

3. When is the last time you cried – in sadness and in joy?

Joy- that is easy. This is a true story about a conversation I had this week. 
I had the crazy hiccups- see previous post. Well I was teaching a math lesson and I hiccuped. Well one of my students said "what the hell was that?" I said "a hiccup" he said "shut your mouth you fart knocker."  It was hilarious. I almost had to leave the room.... so FUNNY!
Sadness, well it involved a boy. Doesn't it always? I got over it. 


4. Do you own a gun – one that is specifically yours? Do you know how to use it?



You know what? I am the ONLY, I mean the ONLY person in my family that doesn't have a gun. The rest are crazy hunting, gun collecting AWESOMENESS. I do speak gun and found out recently that I kinda like to shoot clay pigeons. What I don't like? Killing animals... Don't care if other people do. I just don't. No reason.


 5. Repeat question. Summarize your week!

Week was good. Dang band was all irritated because of the weather, then I had heartburn, then I treated the heartburn and had the joy of waking up multiple times this week chocking on my own stomach acid. I know I am stubborn, but today I had had enough. Called the AWESOME Amy and she came in on a day she doesn't even work, and took some fluid out! SWEET RELIEF! Excited to actually chew something. :) 
Blog land is good. Love all you ladies! 

TTT

1. Vanessa- are you alive? I wait for your 10 Things Thursday post. (Do you all follow her? She is a honey badger to the extreme, and an amazing inspiration. Check her out)

2. My stomach is a pain in my butt... just sayin'. Hopefully I get over feeling yucky soon.

3. Do you guys follow Megan over at Big Bottom Banded. She is in the HELLISH pre-opt diet phase, and rocking it. (She also leaves great comments, and is just pretty awesome... so yeah, go check her out. Do it, you know you want to.)

4. Also, where have Lori and Ronnie been? I miss you lovelies. Come back.

5. Does this post just seem like a shout out to some of my favorite bloggers... well, it kinda is.

6. More cow stuff going down this weekend. :) Pretty excited about it.

7. When I started blogging, especially right after my band was placed, I didn't post much. I left for Las Vegas 4 days after having the band placed, and you know what I did (that I had totally spaced, and my sister reminded me of later) I SWALLOWED my GUM 4 days after surgery. I'm not sure how I lived to tell about it. Crazy right?! I don't suggest it.

8. I'm ashamed at my lack of exercise... I have reasons exuses, but  I will spare you the boring details and tell you, I'm going to get back on the wagon. I AM GOING TOO!

9. All of thel problems I had 104 pounds ago? Yepper, I still have them. Pretty much the same Lorie. (Though a heck of a lot healthier, and more comfortable in my skin. If that makes any sense.)

10. I'm an over sharer and really have to be carefull not to put too many deatials about my personal life here. At least until I am prepared for the world to know... aka everyone on Facebook:)

10.a Criminal Minds was a re-run last night NOT COOL! I love Dr. Reid.

Overweight, a hiccup and a flashback

104 pounds ago:) 

So, I didn't notice until after I'd posted this morning... but HUGE NSV (non scale victory) I'm overweight... JUST overweight on the BMI scale! :) I'm so excited about this.

The other new "band" thing that happened today is I got the hiccups. I'm still on liquids and mushies because my band has been acting fickle, but I had just ate some lunch and I got the hiccups. I thought the little bit of lunch I had ate was going to fly across the classroom. It was the most interesting feeling...

Anyway, did you hear? I'm only overweight according to the BMI scale? True story.

Wednesday Weigh

Start weight: 277
Last week: 176
Todays weight: 173

Loss of 3 pounds. (This may come right back on when I start eating solids again.)

Total loss since May 18 (pre-opt) 104 pounds.

My band is super, super tight- as in liquids are slowly going down but that is about it. When the weather changes from warm to cold, my band tightens up. Then it gets irritated because I don't catch it as fast as I should, and then it gets even tighter. Then I get heartburn... not a good cycle. I started a 14 day treatment for heartburn, and downed about a gallon of Pepto (I shoulda added protein powder, but didn't). So the heartburn is gone, but the I can still feel the acid if that makes any sense?
Anyway, been on liquids since Saturday and the sugar fast kinda went out the window for now. I'll be
back on board as soon as I can get the band to open up a smidgen.

(This is kinda a downer post, but it is what it is.)

Happy Wednesday Ladies!

Weather

When the weather turns colder, my band zips shut. Seriously.

I haven't had success with anything solid in about 5 days. This is the time when I would typically eat some ice  cream and chocolate call it good until the weather evens out.

One little problem, i'm on a junk food fast. So, i've had a glass of water and some broth from soup.

Kinda feeling yucky.

Going to do liquids for a day or two and let things even out.

What affects your LB? Fickle creatures, aren't they?

Dargon Warrior, you going to quit?

No making fun, because I may believe in this movie more than is normal, but there are a lot of life's lessons to be learned from Kung Fu Panda... after all, he is the 'Dragon Warrior.'

Shifu: [intercepting Po, who is fleeing the temple after learning he has to face Tai Lung soon] You cannot leave! A real warrior never quits!
Po: Watch me!
[tries to run around Shifu]
Po: Come on! How am I supposed to beat Tai Lung? I can't even beat you to the stairs!
Shifu: You will beat him because you are the Dragon Warrior!
[pokes Po in his stomach]
Po: You don't believe that!
[Shifu swipes at his hand with Oogway's stick]
Po: You never believed that! From the first moment I got here, you've been trying to get rid of me!
[Shifu knocks him to the ground]
Shifu: Yes! I was! But now I ask you to trust in your master as I have come to trust in mine.
Po: You're not my master. And I'm not the Dragon Warrior.
Shifu: Then why didn't you quit? You knew I was trying to get rid of you, yet you stayed!
Po: Yeah, I stayed. I stayed because everytime you threw a brick at my head or said I smelled; it hurt, but it could never hurt more than everyday of my life just being me. I stayed because I thought if anyone can change me, can make me not me, it was you! The greatest kung fu teacher in all of China!
Shifu: I can change you! I can turn you into the Dragon Warrior! And I will!
Po: Come on! Tai Lung is on his way here right now! And even if it takes him a hundred years to get here, how are *you* gonna change *this* into the Dragon Warrior? Huh? How? How? How!
Shifu: I don't know!
[sighs]
Shifu: I don't know.
Po: [sighs and frowns sadly] That's what I thought.

It is up to us... are we going to quit?

10 Things Thursday!

1. Day 2 of the "no junk food." I'm doing awesome. All I need is a little challenge.

2. I am sick and tired of the wind.

3. My 'formal' exercise has been lacking, been doing other stuff. Gotta get back running frequently. I'm training for a 1/2 marathon.

This is what I did with my spring break:

This picture makes me look fat... but i'm posting anyway to show my inner cowgirl. 

Remember my earlier post and the promise to show you Squishy and all his manliness? Don't worry ladies he is single:)

Squishy, riding Woody G- the stud horse. 

-101 :) Wednesday Weigh

Start weight: 277
Last week: 177.2
Todays weight: 176.0
Weekly Loss: 1.2 pounds
Total Loss: 101 Pounds....

101pounds, I've lost ONE HUNDRED AND ONE POUNDS...

30 day sugar fast (junk food only) starts today. I even got my Dad to join. I can do this. 31 pounds to go! 

Sugar demons

Before the lap-band I like sweets, but I could pass on them. My #1 fav thing was carbs (and Pepsi, I loved Pepsi more than mothers love their new borns.)  I didn't matter how I was getting them, I just loved em. YUMMY.

Well, with the band, my hungar for carbs as slowly waned. I can still eat bread and pasta, etc. Just way smaller portions than I did before and as long as my band isn't being fickle.

Now? I'd rather pass on real food and just have a treat. Can anyone say ice cream? How about ice cream with Butterfingers in it? It is better than Christmas to my inner chubby. Or Kit Kat's, skittles, M&M's, gummy bears, brownies, cake... well you get the idea.

The funny thing is? I didn't even realize this was happening (all things food and weight related seem to happen in slow motion to me.) Anyway, my Granny was serving up homemade chicken noodle soup and rolls and I passed and ate a Zebra cake instead? What? It is a true story. Since then I've know that I need to get a better handle on my SUGAR DEMONS! (Now, don't point fingers, I haven't been indulging it as much as I'd like, the scale would tell on me, but I have been eating more than I should.) So I'm commiting to a 30 day sugar fast. I'm not talking about the sugar in bread or ketchup, just straight up junk food.
 I feel like if I don't get a handle on it, when I'm out of school for the Summer it will become a serious problem and may even cease weightloss or assist with weight gain.

This is serious... I'm creating a sticker chart and everything. For reals, hey, I like stickers, and charts. I'll report in frequently.

This starts tomorrow!

10 ten things

1. I've been a terrible blogger I feel like lately! I'm gonna work on it, but seriously I love the Spring/Summer and all the extra things that go along with it.

2. I'm going to try and start running in the morning before work just so I for sure get those miles in pounding the pavement. I like to run.

3. I'm finally feeling like a "smaller" person. (Not skinny, but not like a heifer.)

4. Did you know it isn't just when you are fat that clothes don't fit right, or they don't have your size? True story, happens to everyone.

5. I saw a crazy low number on the scale this morning... please, please, please stay!

6. Moving cows this weekend. Just wait for the comparison pictures.

7. I am on Spring Break.... much needed. Going to paint my porch (2nd time in the morning, white)and paint my new front door I got for Christmas, Blue. I'm way excited.

8. Jillian Micheals "Trouble Zone" video kicks my ass. Ouchy-moma!

9. I really need to get my room booked for the 1/2 marathon.

10... I honestly just can't think of anything to write for number 10. I'll think of it later and post it!

Why we "workout Wednesday"

And 4 other days a week.... this is post Zumba glow. 

Size large dress and size medium white sweater "thingy."

I don't always love to workout, but I do love how it makes me feel about myself and what it does for my body!

Wednesday Weigh

Starting weight: 277
Last week: 178.9
This week: 177.2
Loss of: 1.7

Total loss: 99.8
There is irony in that my friends! I'm thinking it is the weightloss Gods saying "you're still going to have to watch what you eat over Spring Break or you are never, ever, ever in your entire life, going to reach the 100 pound mark." Consider it noted, and the challenge accepted.

Zumba and a trip to the weight room for Workout Wednesday. What about you?