Thursday, December 15, 2011

I thought about quitting

It has been one of those weeks. My kids at school have been hyper, hyper, hyper! We are definitely excited about Christmas break.
When I get stressed, my band gets tighter. Well I have been crazy stressed this week.... and therefore the band is practically zipped shut. I get the most frustrated when I can't eat anything that is good for me. Last night I tried to eat a food I know is a go for me, and crazy stuck! After like an hour of sliming, it just came up. Well this morning my pouch was really irritated and so I didn't try breakfast. Even water was hurting. So for lunch I just drank a cup of hot coco. Tonight I tried a chicken salad (which is another go-to food for me.) NOT GOOD! No sliming or tossing, but I only ate a bite or two.
Anyway, I regress. Last night I decided just to eat a cup of frozen yogurt for dinner. Everything was to irritated to try anything else, and I KNEW it would go!
So I ate yogurt, and was so mad at myself! Then someone said to me; "Stop stressing. Just relax and give your body time to catch up. You are loosing weight too fast anyway." This was like a salve to my wounded pride. I thought to myself "I'm expecting too much for myself. I should just take a break.
 I weigh 199! Who could expect more? I could weigh this the rest of my life and not feel bad about it. its the holidays.... " I almost let myself talk myself into it. But then I remembered, I want to be more, I expect more of myself. I refuse to be a statistic. I will loose the next 50 pounds! I'm not giving up! Even when someone gives me permission too!

No comments:

Post a Comment