Kow-a-bunga

"Would you like me to give you a formula for success? It's quite simple, really. Double your rate of failure. You are thinking of failure as the enemy of success. But it isn't at all. You can be discouraged by failure or you can learn from it, So go ahead and make mistakes. Make all you can. Because remember that's where you will find success." 

- Thomas J. Watson 




I'm going to tell you ladies that this is the real deal. People tell me that I inspire them, well I haven't felt very inspiring lately, in fact, I feel just the opposite. (Miki, I love you! We have always been so much a like. Wanna run a 5k together? You pick one and I'll drive out and do it with you? Or we could just plan a day and run our own 5k? What do you think? I'm serious.) Ladies, check her blog out! She isn't a banded diva but she is bad-A none-the-less!

I'm going to run a 1/2 marathon, I'm going to finish before the van of shame has to come pick me up.
I'm going to get to goal weight.
I'm going to continue to live a healthier, more active lifestyle.
I'm going to be a fierce Dragon Warrior- for life.

What have I learned about myself? That I can't exclude entire food groups. Saying "absolutely no candy/treats" has triggered more binging than any other thing I've ever attempted (not been pretty ladies). So I'm going to continue with my previous plan with a few adaptations. (Thanks to Cat)

1 point for each mile ran.
1 point for each day I stay under 1200 calories.
1 point for each day that I meet expectations for a workout.
3 points for each pound lost.

-1 point for each 1-99 calories I go over my 1200 calorie allotment.
-1 point for each skipped exercise.

Each point is worth 1 dollar, I can chose when to redeem the points, but not before my 1 year bandiversary. (This post is going to rock... well I hope. At least the pictures will be memorable.)

What do you think ladies? Can I do it?

Shameful 10 Things Thursday (Butter(freaking)finger)

1.       What in the hell is wrong with me? Honestly?! The week has been great, doing well food choices, and exercise rocking! Then, yesterday? Morning- awesome. Even though I was traveling. Then, on the way home, I tossed my sugar/junk food fast out the window- I don’t know how it happened. I ate orange sherbet, because everyone else was. Then I ate a Butter(freaking)finger,  I don’t even know how it got there. Then? I ate another one… I was seriously in a zone where I knew what I was doing but just didn’t give a shit. Then? Oh, yeah, then I ate a ½ bag of Kettl* Cooked Salt and Vinegar chips (don’t trick yourself into thinking it was a grab size bag). Then? Then I skipped running. Yeah, so much for making better habits. I’m disgusted with myself. DISGUSTED. And I was so, so, so sick. Then I didn’t sleep well at all? I wonder why- duh!

2.       I’ve got to make some serious mental adjustments if I am going to rock this weight loss long term.

3.       Warrior status? Monday- 1000 calories, 2 mile run (Which hurt because I hadn’t been in 2 weeks, but felt good anyway.)  Tuesday- 1200 calories, 3 mile run! Felt good, really hot.

4.       I’m seriously wondering if I can run a ½ marathon. I just feel like everything is spiraling out of control, and it is my own fault.

5.       I think this is the post-binge depression talking.

6.       I bought size 8 shorts yesterday. Wonder how long they would fit if I continued down the buttered path?

7.       Did I mention that both of the Butter(Freaking) fingers were KING SIZED! (Or share size I think they call them these days, but I’m not sharing.)

8.       I had to make two stops at 7-11 for the Butter(freaking)fingers.

9.       The lady at 7-11 (I live in a small town, and so people just know people) said; “So and so told me you have lost a lot of weight.” I said “yeah, I have” she then looks at my SECOND KING SIZE Butter(freaking)finger in a 20 minute span and said “how?” I could tell she was thinking “No freaking way, you lazy, yucky, Butter(Freaking)finger eating bum. I wasn’t ashamed enough not to mindlessly eat that sucker in the car. Shame came later.

10.   The difference between 11 months ago and today? 11 months ago I would have continued to eat today (liek I did yesterday), not felt guilty, and just kept on keeping on. Today? Back off sugar. 4 mile run planned. I might have took a STUPID pit stop at Butter(freaking)finger land, but I didn’t park there. I’m already leaving and on my way to a better place.

a.       I wanna be in the 160’s next weigh-in and I know I can do it.

weekly weigh

Start weight: 277

Last week: 173 (liquids because band was being crazy)

This week: 172.2 I'm happy with any loss since I'm eating again.

Total loss: 104.8

Get your workout on! I'm traveling but I'll fit in something today... hopefully a walk around a mall :)

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My Dragon Warrior plan for June 1st...

So, remember when I went on a sugar fast? Then a few days after that my band tightened up like a bi-polar cow and refused to let me eat anything solid for a week? I couldn't eat "normally" until I went and got some fluid out of my band. The problem is, when I was off of solids, I broke the sugar fast and had some ice cream. (Judge if you want. Haters gonna hate.) Anyway, I proceeded to eat my way through the weekend, smart I know.
Well, I'm back on the wagon today, ready to kill the next 28 pounds. My plan of attack (which I will be reporting on daily, because I think I need some major accountability) is the following.

Sugar/junk food fast until June 1st- which is 40 days and just happens to be my 1 year bandaversiry, and the day before my 25 birthday.
Order some UNJURY protein powder.
100 ounces of water a day.
Protein first
pack a lunch, don't skip this meal.
EXERCISE! (I've been a slacker, even had a dream that I tried on my exercise pants and they exploded in 109 thousand pieces because I was so huge, paranoid much?)
AND....
I'm going to pay myself to get where I want to be by the "1 year date."  June 1st!

Here's the deal:
40 Day junk food fast- $40
35 days of exercise- $35
Weigh 162- 50$
1$ dollar for every pound lost total- hopefully$115
4$ for every pointed dropped on the BMI scale- hopefully $80
1-6 mile "I didn't stop one time" run- $40
1 dollar for every mile ran- hopefully a lot.

I've got a plan ladies, now I'm going to CRUSH IT!

Happy Monday

BYOC

This is my first BYOC... Thanks Draz! 
1. Do you have any siblings? What is your relationship with them? Good, bad, ugly?

I have 3 siblings and 1 sister-in-law. I pretty much love them all. 
Oldest brother and his wife live through the hay field from my parents (Yeah, we are those people.) SIL is a huge support for me. AMAZING (and she has cute kids.) 
Squishy, the youngest brother, is a hound hunting, gun toting, Mountain Man. I love him, and think he is hilarious. 
Tater, the sister, is one of my best friends. She is a animal whisperer... seriously, she just connects with animals and is amazing. 
My relationships with them are all good, and kinda different, we spend TONS of time together. 

I don't have a picture of my Older brother and his family on my computer:) 

2. Let’s talk pizza. Do you prefer homemade or restaurant? What toppings are your fave?

Restaurant, thin crispy crust, Hawaiian. Yummy. 

3. When is the last time you cried – in sadness and in joy?

Joy- that is easy. This is a true story about a conversation I had this week. 
I had the crazy hiccups- see previous post. Well I was teaching a math lesson and I hiccuped. Well one of my students said "what the hell was that?" I said "a hiccup" he said "shut your mouth you fart knocker."  It was hilarious. I almost had to leave the room.... so FUNNY!
Sadness, well it involved a boy. Doesn't it always? I got over it. 


4. Do you own a gun – one that is specifically yours? Do you know how to use it?



You know what? I am the ONLY, I mean the ONLY person in my family that doesn't have a gun. The rest are crazy hunting, gun collecting AWESOMENESS. I do speak gun and found out recently that I kinda like to shoot clay pigeons. What I don't like? Killing animals... Don't care if other people do. I just don't. No reason.


 5. Repeat question. Summarize your week!

Week was good. Dang band was all irritated because of the weather, then I had heartburn, then I treated the heartburn and had the joy of waking up multiple times this week chocking on my own stomach acid. I know I am stubborn, but today I had had enough. Called the AWESOME Amy and she came in on a day she doesn't even work, and took some fluid out! SWEET RELIEF! Excited to actually chew something. :) 
Blog land is good. Love all you ladies! 

TTT

1. Vanessa- are you alive? I wait for your 10 Things Thursday post. (Do you all follow her? She is a honey badger to the extreme, and an amazing inspiration. Check her out)

2. My stomach is a pain in my butt... just sayin'. Hopefully I get over feeling yucky soon.

3. Do you guys follow Megan over at Big Bottom Banded. She is in the HELLISH pre-opt diet phase, and rocking it. (She also leaves great comments, and is just pretty awesome... so yeah, go check her out. Do it, you know you want to.)

4. Also, where have Lori and Ronnie been? I miss you lovelies. Come back.

5. Does this post just seem like a shout out to some of my favorite bloggers... well, it kinda is.

6. More cow stuff going down this weekend. :) Pretty excited about it.

7. When I started blogging, especially right after my band was placed, I didn't post much. I left for Las Vegas 4 days after having the band placed, and you know what I did (that I had totally spaced, and my sister reminded me of later) I SWALLOWED my GUM 4 days after surgery. I'm not sure how I lived to tell about it. Crazy right?! I don't suggest it.

8. I'm ashamed at my lack of exercise... I have reasons exuses, but  I will spare you the boring details and tell you, I'm going to get back on the wagon. I AM GOING TOO!

9. All of thel problems I had 104 pounds ago? Yepper, I still have them. Pretty much the same Lorie. (Though a heck of a lot healthier, and more comfortable in my skin. If that makes any sense.)

10. I'm an over sharer and really have to be carefull not to put too many deatials about my personal life here. At least until I am prepared for the world to know... aka everyone on Facebook:)

10.a Criminal Minds was a re-run last night NOT COOL! I love Dr. Reid.

Overweight, a hiccup and a flashback

104 pounds ago:) 

So, I didn't notice until after I'd posted this morning... but HUGE NSV (non scale victory) I'm overweight... JUST overweight on the BMI scale! :) I'm so excited about this.

The other new "band" thing that happened today is I got the hiccups. I'm still on liquids and mushies because my band has been acting fickle, but I had just ate some lunch and I got the hiccups. I thought the little bit of lunch I had ate was going to fly across the classroom. It was the most interesting feeling...

Anyway, did you hear? I'm only overweight according to the BMI scale? True story.